The Rabbi: The End of a Beginning by The Rev Scott Petersen
This essay’s purpose is to summarize The Caring for Clergy in Difficult Calls Writing Project. As a seed carries the mighty oak, beginnings often carry within them the end. As a way to end this beginning effort, I’ll start with a true account. The following was told to me by a fellow Episcopal priest following his forced resignation.
In a small town, the priest shared that his spouse decided that she wanted a divorce. Shock 1. When leaders in the parish heard that the spouse wanted out of the marriage, they began to seek his removal and began a rumor campaign against him. Shock 2. When the parish leaders sought his removal, he was surprised to discover that the Bishop sided with the parish. Shock 3. He was left without a job in a small town with children to raise as the court saw that the children stayed with him. He was devastated. His children were devastated.
In short order, the priest was betrayed by his spouse, his church, and his Bishop. He felt like a pariah. Alone. Shunned. Shock 4.
The only one who reached out to him, following what was a brutal experience in ministry, was the local rabbi.The Rabbi, in going to the devastated priest, cut across the systemic shunning that had just occurred. The Rabbi went to the priest and in doing so, began to bind his wounds.
As Church, we visit the sick. We proclaim Easter. We feed the hungry. We visit the imprisoned. We share our love. As the bride of Christ, we do much to cast Christ’s light in the world.
Something that can cast great light is also capable of casting shadow. We, as the bride of Christ cast a great shadow when we cast aside our own. The rationale for doing so can be legion. Be it: troubled parishes; anxiety in the system; economic hardship; faulty calling processes; kicking the can down the road in the face of conflict; or even, cut-throat expediency in light of failure. Our response to those who go through it, as a body wed to the Grace that Christ both manifests and points to, does not yet live up to what we espouse.
We as a church can do better. We know this.
Our beginning effort to do better.
In the Episcopal Women’s Caucus (EWC) and the Network of Episcopal Clergy Association (NECA’s) essay series we have tried to do better. Intentionally, we sought to bring a variety of authors from different points throughout the church to offer their perspective on the Elephant in the Room. We asked them to envision how we as a church might “do better.”
In a non reactive way, a group of individual writers have attempted to bring light to an area in our common life that seems to prefer the dark. Rather than simply point at a problem we have also tried to open it up in order to explore how it may be addressed. This beginning work, as it has always been understood to be, has simply tried to better identify the ground around “forced resignations” of clergy. Our hope is that such an effort may help lead the church toward systemic change in how we approach conflict and care for priests in such conflicted situations.
It is hard to tell the long term impact that the essays have had. The world certainly has not stayed still while we have done so. In the last 12 weeks we have seen Ferguson, the invasion of the Ukraine, ISIS, ISIL, Ebola and, at least for those inside the Episcopal tent, the unfolding drama at GTS.
Yet even with all that, it still seems as if we have struck a cord. In the 13 weeks between the initial News Release, the essay’s themselves, we have registered over 11,000 page views between the NECA site and the EWC site.
More importantly than the momentary interest that the essay have evoked, we have also created an electronic body of material about what can be a touchy subject. These essay’s and resources (incomplete, as they are) remain online. They remain both as a potential means to help bind the wounds of stung clergy and a means to continue to proclaim to the wider Church that “We can do better.”
Will we?
Knowing that we as a church can do better is different than doing so.
Can we also find the political will and courage to move from understanding to action? Can we create a systemic approach to care for clergy? Can we de-stigmatize how we view failure and begin to share best practices? Can we build accountability practices that helps clergy better see their own part? Just as important, can we build accountability practices that acknowledge/correct/transform Diocesan and parishes part as well?
That is unknown at this time.
The cynics, of course, will say “No. The system prefers the most preferred way through. That the clergy is identified as “problem” and quietly ushered out.”
I’m not so sure.
This effort crystallized following a very unanticipated resolution in the Diocese of Newark relating to the bullying of clergy. That was back in January 2014. That result began a conversation that led the vision of this project. That vision opened the door to writers who spent Epiphany (and beyond) crafting what they have in the service of a very real need.Certainly since, no one here anticipated 11,000+ page views which resulted from this effort. What you may not be aware of is this writing effort has also opened the door for a collection of priests to begin to tell their stories of conflict and forced resignations anonymously.
From this writers vantage point that series of events seem amazing. It suggests the Spirit at work.
Is this simply a flash in the pan issue?
Again, we are not sure.
The very fact that you are reading this suggests that the Holy Spirit may have other plans in mind when it comes to a formal Ministry of care to Clergy coming out of difficult calls.
We remain hopeful about what such steps have produced. We are grateful for the relationships that have been developed. While the official partnership between NECA and the EWC to produce, coordinate and distribute such essays comes to a close with this piece, I imagine that all parties will remain curious about what the Holy Spirit might have in mind. We remain open for opportunities. We’ll see. We at NECA certainly have gratitude for our partners at the EWC and the gifted writers who potentially risked political capital to share their view.
If nothing else, this project all along has sought to expose some of that which has remained hidden. By bringing light to it we wish to close the gap between what we espouse as a loving body of believers and the treatment of those leaders stung in such challenging calls.
So what has been shared to address, as one author put it, “this dark corner of the church?”
In the order of the essay’s release:
Donald Romanik in Confronting Clergy- Congregational Conflict wrote about the ongoing need for increased training both for clergy, parishes, and Diocese to both limit the waste of resources such conflict produces and the detriment to the clergy, parishioners, and Dioceses stung by it.
Tom Ehrich in Let’s be Adults and Partners examines the presuppositions which undergird how clergy and parishioners relate. He suggests a new ground for understanding our mutual roles and offers a model that might help eliminate the power struggles that emerge when roles are undefined.
Terri Pilarski in Forced Pastoral Exits: A Tale of Three Churches recommends that leaders build personal awareness that parishes are emotional systems. She highlights and recommends that when conflict and anxiety rise that leaders need to self differentiate, be clear about their own position, remain a non-anxious presence and remain in conversation.
Dennis Fotinos in Walking With instead of Walking Away advocates that the Episcopal Church adopt a model he encountered in the ECLA. That clergy coming out of difficult calls receive pastoral care from a fellow clergy person who is committed to walking with them as butone key way to share that they are not alone.
Bud Holland in A Way Forward calls for clergy to be dedicated to the long view of their call and be rededicated to the values of courage, perseverance and resilience in and through their call.
Dennis Maynard in Beyond “a Challenge” articulated 7 areas to address from how we identify abuse in a parish to the impact forced resignations have not only on the priest but the congregation itself.
Charles Chandler in Check the Congregations DNAcalls clergy to be aware and to understand a parishes history- noting especially their ongoing responses to conflict and how communities process such conflict.
In Defense of Vocare, I advocated that a difficult call is not the end of ministry. It may be God’s crucible for a priest to develop and deepen their vocation. In the Episcopal Church, CREDO by their own volition or by a General Convention resolution, may be the best vehicle to deliver resources, education, and care for clergy coming through such difficult calls.
Bonnie Anderson in The Courage to Speak Up and Speak the Truth, points clergy towards and calls on benevolent matriarch’s and patriarch’s of the church to use their personal authority to quell discord and help lead a community out of divisive conflict.
David Gortner in Devolution: The Dynamics of Power and Permission writes of the systemic difficulty power has on parishes. He calls specifically for the articulation of set clear boundaries; the strengthening and education of priests in their setting; and the safeguarding of such settings for all involved.
Frank Logue in The Diocese advocates that Diocese and Diocesan staff can both train clergy about conflict as it relates to their current call and train vestries to live further into healthy communication. In such conflicted calls, he writes, the Bishop’s office needs to be involved to support the clergy person and help navigate the waters when and if such calls end in a forced resignation.
And the significance of the Rabbi shared at the beginning of this piece?
The priest who shared the encounter went on and did make it through. Now, years later, he continues his priestly ministry. His children, now grown, also made it through. He shares that encounter not as a tale of despair, but as a vehicle to express hope. He shares that it is possible to walk through great trauma in one’s vocation and with God’s help, thrive.
For the priest, the Rabbi was and is a physical reminder that the Covenant is true. Not Sacrament maybe but sacramental. An outward sign of an inward grace. As for him so maybe for us. We, after all, as a Church, like Rabbi’s.
In our Church we have a penchant for Rabbi’s who bring peace rather than discord. We preach about a singular rabbi who was gifted as a healer. We, as a church, share the good news of a rabbi who called his disciples to love God and to love their neighbor as they love themselves. As a Church each Sunday, as an ongoing echo of that first Easter, we tell and retell the great story about how such a Rabbi, devastated by great violence and injustice, surprised his disciples when he greeted them in the breaking of bread. The rumors were not enough to hold him down. The persecution was not enough to end his call. The loneliness of Calvary was not the final word. Locked doors were not enough to hold Him back.
Even though I will never know who the particular Rabbi shared about in the beginning of the piece, I do want to say “ Thank You.” I dedicate this series to his witness. His Witness speaks about a Rabbi I do strive to know in my vocation both as a Christian and as a Priest. As a Church that proclaims the power of Christ’s love for the world, we would do well to imitate you who went to the broken priest in need. After all, a single candle in the darkness still casts a great light.
To the one in great need I pray you find such a witness. More importantly, may we who read this not shy away from being such witnesses one to another.